Today was going to be one of those days. I just knew it. I knew today was going to be so fucking boring…I just decided to spruce it up a bit. For those who have been forwarded this page, read a bit. I guarantee that your going to laugh, if not a little, then alot. Or maybe your that one guy who offered his sister…anywoo…
I was at work when I decided to post “Free Tickets” to tonites Playoff Game. The Rangers Vs the Sabres. I didnt do it for no reason at all. At least Im a ticket broker.
But you people took it to a hilarious level. I posted an ad on craigslist ( http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/tix/322282290.html ). And the emails KEPT COMING. You people are ignorant, and made my day THAT much better. Heres a few excerpts from people who wanted to trade a few things for these coveted tickets….
”you can shave my head bald if you like”
“…my sister is kinda slutty…I hope you like bjs!!!!!!!11!! sluprslurp”
“…so pick me!im a funny drunk”
“are you single?”
“ill love you in more ways then one if you give me a ticket”
“…so i dont feel right taking a ticket for free but can my mom have a ticket?”
“you are so cool. i dont even like hokkey but ill go.”
”if your gay I got a brother for that kinda thing :)”
“i dont have a BF and i have pink kinky hair”
“if you have any legal problems, im an attorney”
“im a barber and can give you a free spiffy haircut”
……and my personal favorite….
“your a filthy fucking lier. you dont have any free tickets. why do you have to fuck around with people who BLEED blue?! your an asshole. but if you do have tickets, can I have 1?”
WOW…you truley are the biggest loser, and not in the good, weight loss way either. Your just the biggest fucking loser on the planet. YOU sir, need to perish…but on a solid note, I didnt have any tickets, I never did, and I had a fantastic time laughing my ass off as the total of 314 emails came my way, practically slobbing on my knob for a chance to see a sport that doesnt matter anymore. Thank you….fucking jews…